“Will paused, imagining that it would be impossible for Dorothea to misunderstand this; indeed he felt that he was contradicting himself and offending against his self-approval in speaking to her so plainly; but still – it could not be fairly called wooing a woman to tell her that he would never woo her. It must be admitted to be a ghostly kind of wooing. But Dorothea’s mind was rapidly going over the past with quite another vision than his. The thought that she herself might be what Will most cared for did throb through her an instant, but then came doubt: the memory of the little they had lived through together turned pale and shrank before the memory which suggested how much fuller might have been the intercourse between Will and some one else with whom he had had constant companionship...” (Eliot, 510)
Dorothea and Ladislaw’s refusal to express their true feelings, despite intended to be a moral behavior, was in fact an agony resulted by self-denial.
Dorothea and Ladislaw’s love towards each other seems to be passionate, considering how Ladislaw has been lingering in Middlemarch for Dorothea, and how frequently Dorothea has been thinking about Ladislaw. However, none of them are willing to take the first step to tell each other how they truly feel. To Ladislaw and Dorothea, their action of concealing their emotions is intended to be a moral behavior. This “moral behavior”, however has caused more harm to both of them.
To Ladislaw, his refusal to confess to Dorothea is drew upon the concern that their love will do no good to Dorothea. Ladislaw believes that if Dorothea marries him, she will become “penniless” (Eliot, 505). For the sake of Dorothea’s fortune, Ladislaw himself decides that it will be the best for Dorothea to not marry him, until he has accumulated a certain amount of wealth. Moreover, as Ladislaw has recently discovered about his mother’s family, he believes that Dorothea’s friends will look down on him due to his family background. Owing to these concerns, Ladislaw hesitates about expressing his true feelings to Dorothea. In parallel to Ladislaw’s worries, Dorothea is also reluctant to express her thoughts to Ladislaw. Dorothea remembers the day when she found that Ladislaw is playing the piano with Mrs. Lydgate. Rosamond’s presence forbids Dorothea to say too much to Ladislaw about her feelings as she believes that it is Rosamond but not her that Will loves. To Dorothea, leaving Ladislaw with Rosamond is the best for him as that is who she thinks he loves. While both Dorothea and Ladislaw insists that their action of hiding their feelings are an act of moral. Their actions did nothing but hurt each other.
Ladislaw and Dorothea are miserable as they could not confess to one another about how they feel. Before confirming whether the love is mutual, they could only suppress their feelings and words inside their hearts. This is therefore nothing short of torment to both of them. The relieve and joy of Dorothea after knowing that Ladislaw loves her proves that the repressing of her feelings is her source of agony. She later regrets not realizing Ladislaw’s love earlier, “I only wish I had known before... then we could be quite happy in thinking of each other, though we are forever parted” (Eliot, 512). Before understanding their love towards each other, both of them have been sorrow. Ladislaw turns bleak and drained of life after receiving the neutral response from Dorothea (Eliot, 509), while Dorothea is wounded by the mere movement and angry tone of Ladislaw (Eliot, 509). They both care so much about and have grown so attached to one another’s thought, simple words and movements of each other is more than enough to sway their emotions easily. However, not being able to have a comprehensive understanding of how the other thinks resulted in their tragedy.
Self-denial is a crucial factor for the refusal of Dorothea and Ladislaw to express their true feelings. Both Ladislaw and Dorothea are uncertain about the feelings of one another towards themselves. Instead of seeking for the answer by asking directly, both of them choose to progress the idea inside their mind and deny every possibility that they are being loved by the other. To Ladislaw, he wishes to know if Dorothea has any love for him, and if she does, he would not hesitate staying in Middlemarch for her. However, even in their last conversation, he keeps denying that Dorothea loves him. After all the talk, he still wonders by himself, “has she any love for him” (Eliot, 511). The same happens to Dorothea. Despite having an instant belief of Ladislaw’s love towards her, she finally doubts it and denies the memory of them living together, resolving that it is Rosamond that Ladislaw loves (Eliot, 511). No matter how both of them are trying to confirm one another’s feelings, and no matter how they are trying to convey their feelings subtly or “plainly”, as Ladislaw thought he was, in their speech, both of them could not understand the other’s underlying meaning as they continue to deny every possibility in their mind that their love is mutual. Self-denial frequently appears in Dorothea and Ladislaw and it forbids them to express their true feelings, finally separating the two.
The “moral behavior” of Ladislaw and Dorothea turns out to be an agony to both of them. It is also very ironic that Eliot mentions how they always “feel confidence and the happy freedom which comes with mutual understanding” (Eliot, 508), as both of them are unable to mutually understand one another’s love. If Ladislaw or Dorothea have been more direct and clear in expressing their true feelings, would their story still end up with the discontent and sadness of the two?
Works Cited
Eliot, George, and Rosemary Ashton. Middlemarch. London: Penguin Books, 2003.